June 03, 2009

Why do people HAVE to get married???

One of my best friends in school got engaged yesterday and when a friend gets engaged, there's only one proper reaction: TERROR. Engagement is often the doorway to matrimony; the foremost reason of monogamy. And as someone who really despises marriage I would choose to prevent it or stay far away from it.
The fact that my twin and I are eligible young women in the ripe age of 25 means that at family gatherings we get a lot of advice from people we would try and avoid on the street if we saw them. They begin by asking about my job and then eventually bring up available men. Family friends’ sons, their son, sons of their friends, or ‘this-person-they-know’.
They ask us for our tastes in men: Appearance? Behavior? Aged or (yeah, I don’t get a choice in the other department). I say, “Money”, but they know me well enough to know I’m teasing. A joke to bury my response, for to disclose myself in this way is to reveal a weakness. So they tiptoe around the matter and ask me if I like anyone, imagining that if I tell them about a person I’m attracted to, they’ll be able to make out what person I’m searching for. It’s knotty, I think to myself, and reply with a sharp “No”. They ask me if anyone likes me. “No”. That’s even more knotted up.
Last week, my groom finder (yes, I have one. All thanks to my lovely folks) asked me how old I was. “25″, I told him, “Still, only 25”. “Well”, he says, “we’ll find someone for you now and by the time you’re 27 you’ll be all settled down. It’s time for you to get married. So don’t put this off”. He says a couple of Naga boys; he knows of, are looking to settle down with someone here. My older sister walks in and announces, “There won’t be another Naga in this family. One is enough.” Phew! Thank god for her big mouth. That ended the conversation for now.

My parents and their friends who regularly visit our home tell me that they want to make sure I don’t get involved with the wrong type of men. Someone who will take our money once we’re married, or force me to stay with him once he traps me with children. I want to tell them, that I hate the thought of having kids of my own, but I shut up because that could stir another riot. They go on to tell me that I need my parents full approval if I want to get married to someone and if I have someone in mind I should bring him to meet them, to make sure they’re okay with it.

I wonder; is love this easy for other people? Something others can control, when I can’t control it myself?

I get very nervous and fearful when I’m at the office nowadays. This is because I don’t like to admit to myself that something’s wounding me, but when I’m there, it’s a very real reminder that I have problems with my work.

I’m at odds on more than a few concerns but let’s not get into it. Moving on to the MUZICK!!!

Hailing from the streets of Georgia ‘The Dead Confederate’ has been making gorgeous rock/ psychedelic music for the last 3 years. Props go to my beautiful ears for singling out this band and today I’ll be playing you guys a track called ‘Rat’, that got them sup-ah famous this summer. With the huge exposure this track acquired, I’m sure they won’t have a problem earning fans. Their sound is brooding and melancholic, not in an overly bleak way but more so thoughtful and reflective. It’s definitely not music you’ll want to blast out in the car, but for those quiet moments in-between (best experienced on headphones). So, yea, I’m really digging it. You can count me as one of those who have utterly fallen for this band.

7 Pulses Say:

painkiller said...

is it just me high on meds or does dead confederate really sound like nirvana?

imcha said...

groom finder?
naga bois?

Btw, Congratulations to EC!

Eveline said...

@Painkiller: They do... a bit. On this track they do sound very much like something Kurt Cobain would've come up with. They both fall under grunge. The Dead Confederate has an Alternative sound while Nirvana leaned more towards Punk.

@Imcha: Thank you, Imcha. Yes, my life is about to get very very complicated! :( Up side is, that the complications will serve as tasty content on EC so YAY!! :)

illusionaire said...

And if you can't find your Mr.Right among the Naga boys, come look among the Mizo boys. We are almost the same :D

hehe.. I see you are bitten by the marriage bug too. 25s. Usually happens that time. But you'll soon be impervious to their remarks as time goes by... :-)

Eveline said...

The dreadful 25... It sucks to reach the wonderful age of independence and then asked to think about being shackled up with a guy for the rest of your life! I wonder if they have a talisman to keep away thoughts of marriage??

Reine de mots said...

Lov dis! Totally ion my mind too n nobody gets it and god bless you if u say u don want kids....dats lik havin d plague!!!

Eveline said...

So many things you don't know if you're interested but you do know when you're not interested. Flatmates, Jobs, Marriage!! etc.

(How do you tell people u just arent interested?) Is it because they don't really care who you are as long as you're a woman, or that personality is overwhelmed by the norm or what?