April 22, 2009

I know as a grown adult it’s absolutely superficial to reveal that I suffer crush-like characteristics because whatever I’m feeling right now translates to ‘Love at first sight’; which according to me is a juvenile-headed passing infatuation, an idiotic or flippant obsession, an unfounded, inexpressible, wild feeling.

Maybe I’m incapable of learning from past mistakes, or I’m a supreme believer of being in love with love itself.

I ‘m still shy and a little self-conscious, when it comes to approaching someone I like. I’ve never matured into the modern woman’s way of asking guys out of, but since college I’ve learned that boys are a good thing. Certainly, men are better.
I would tell myself, “This feeling will go by. This is a part of your life, a silly crush; time or chance will have me come off this.”
And it happened as expected. I would get over it eventually, having talked to myself of such a plan. Then one day, I realized that I was only deceiving myself. It became obvious when I’d think of that someone in the rhythm of every song. It’s amusing to think that with the good judgment a person would’ve achieved with age, I can still be made to feel such a pubescent emotion. I don’t think I expected myself to feel this way again, at this age, not with what I’ve been through.

So I contacted a few friends, got a name of the mysterious Mr. Good Looking and made contact. I suppose it shouldn’t come as a surprise; this one’s been a source of dreamy inspiration as of late. Composing a little note got me all flustered and got to be nothing but a display of ridiculous words. Something that’s funny in observation, but rather maddening in the moment.

To be so distressed this way always takes me by surprise.

And then a simple reply and your heart stops. What a silly thing a crush is.

Every single day that I am at work I find a way to listen to music. Some days I find myself drifting along to whatever 100Hitz The Alternative Rock Station has to offer; other days I browse random websites, myspace pages, and other forms of online media like youtube, and on a few days each month I dive into old albums and songs that I’ve always loved. I love music and I love to hear random tracks, brilliant live covers, and new music from artists that I genuinely appreciate.

There used to be a television series that I was quite addicted to a couple of years ago. It was called ‘One Tree Hill’. Only two seasons were aired in India and let’s face it, which sucks. For those of you who missed it here’s the basic formula of the plot. A bunch of good looking actors and actresses convince you they’re in high school. Once they've succeeded doing that, they suck you into a never ending storyline filled with mysterious histories, more high school drama, and quite a bit of the sex.

Besides that they have a pretty killer soundtrack and a bunch of amazing tracks devoted entirely to each season. I love their albums by the way, and here’s something from Season 5.

I realize that many of you won’t read this post and really don’t give a rats ass about anything. But just in case you are reading this post but too lazy to go to their MySpace page there’s a little player for you weaker minded fiends. Just click on the play button. I have a feeling that everything this band touches is wonderful.