My Usual Existential Crisis and The Verve

Five reasons why my day isn’t so good- The air conditioning at work makes my fingers numb and makes me visit the bathroom hourly. The cold virus is up and about and I haven’t got it yet which only means that when it actually does catches up with me I’m going to be out like a sedated beast. My American boss has not been very merciful on my audit scores. My TL and I have been working out ways to prove his case wrong. Mr. Flirt has not had any time for me lately. And finally, I’m just awfully moody. I’ll try a cigarette for now because my pills will just knock me out and there is much blogging left to do.

So, I made plans with my friend Ash this weekend. Hopefully a change in surroundings will perk up the mood, as I’ve been particularly down in the dumps these past couple of days- I’ve always known I was perfect material for an early mid-life crisis. Lately, I’ve been having nightmares. Which is kinda weird since it’s been a long while since I’ve even dreamt. These nightmares usually involve some ugly revelation about something or somebody I really like. For the past few years, it seems I’ve shut down my brain, turned on the autopilot switch and now it’s like all psychological blockades are falling apart from growing old. Goodness, I really have a problem with this age thing. I find it funny how something that used to excite me before, doesn’t anymore. Few things in life feel new. I guess that’s why most old people travel to find something fresh and experience something new. But what happens if you don’t like traveling? Then I suppose you live your life like one of those characters T.S Eliot was talking about in ‘The Wasteland’- Not living but just existent pieces of flesh. Don’t you just love Eliot? For me, He and Nostradamus were so much alike. They had that whole shock factor thing going. Nostradamus was the monster when I was growing up. My parents made me watch those scary movies of his when I was a kid. In college, it was Eliot. But then again I have people I care about, beliefs I hold onto and music to make me feel like I have some sort of purpose after all.

So, I just wait for something good to come my way.

‘Sonnet’ by ‘The Verve’ is undoubtedly the most beautiful track from the album ‘Urban Hymns’ released in 1997. Since a sonnet is really a terribly ordered piece of poetry. I always thought the song was a reference to love not being perfect, the way it seems in poetry. Seriously, this is a wonderful track to have stumbled upon this month and I’m convinced that this song should go up on the post today. Enjoy at your leisure.