September 08, 2008

People ask me why I am attracted to cute, extraordinarily self-involved people who are into the arts be it photography, painting, singing etc. Weirdly I feel some measure of inexplicable desirability towards them. When I get into it, I’m always thinking that this one is different from all the others and he proves it just for a few days. He recharged batteries you thought were dead, boosted your fading morale and massaged your deserted ego. And then your little trip is over when he doesn’t really give a damn to know what you like anymore. He doesn’t want to get your hints and he can’t care less if he’s pushing the right buttons. You think both of you are trying to make this work. Really, it’s just you trying and then it gets a little sticky and you go home, curled up in bed thinking ‘it’s my fault’ and you see, that’s exactly what he wants. The artist, never likes to nudge or hint or take his hand and move it or even blurt out ‘It’s over’. No, they’re difficult for a reason. They’re out there to make you realize that you don’t fit into their made up little complex world, you don’t fit into his ritual and you’re just an interchangeable character in his script. When you’ve been at this game as long as I have, the hope that others maybe different from your ex, is hard to come by. There’s a place for optimism, of course, but please, I’d have to be crazy to live there. So, I’ve decided I’m going to make some changes. I, honestly, do not like older men because I think they’ve had their share of fun and I’d be too childish for them. But I think I’m going to give them a try. I already have one in mind. This is sure to give me some instant content to work with.

I feel like my head is going to split even more than usual because today I consumed no tea and no sugar. I did this because I am so addicted to the book ‘You Are Here’ written by our girl The Compulsive Confessor. I have been sitting bolt upright at work since morning reading the book. If I had a book like that to read everyday I would never be depressed again.
Sometimes blogging can be as much of a curse as it is a blessing. Let me start with the blessing. I usually have lots of time to listen to loads of music. The curse comes into play when I love a band and I have them on repeat for a few months before they’re drowned out by the latest bands everyone simply must listen to. Sometimes old and less famous favorites get lost in this mish mash of new music. Fortunately, for the music world last week my boss introduced me to a band called The Pineapple Thief. I’ve listened to this particular track called ‘Shoot First’ countless times that I sing along to aloud, regardless as to who’s listening. Here is enough that could easily qualify as a good starting point for your Pineapple Thief love affair.

3 Pulses Say:

Avanish said...

I agree with your loong time experimentation with realtionships(atleast I think so)...

A very basic thing is that everyone wants to be in the limelight...and that is where they puddle in the ditch :D

manuscrypts said...

hmm, wonder if there's a stereotyping risk involved here..

Eveline said...

@avanish: Oh! i'm done with all of that now. Guess, i'm going to be making some wise decisions this b'day. Hey thanks for commenting.

@manusrypts: You know I thought I was being kinda prejudiced...I guess that's what happens when you write(type) with frustration.